Spoken Poetry - 2
(41)
What if we made it. alive, without thinking twice about the things that could easily end us, what if you came to me with no resistance and no pain, with your true self that you’re not afraid to show it to me, what if.. what if.. what if.. what if i can’t stop thinking about us, would I ever be okay?
Alanoud H.A.
(42)
Just because your physical body made to be stronger than mine that doesn’t mean you have a stronger personality, nor it means that your confused mind is better than my stable mind, if you scream at me with your empty words trying to scare me, remember, that I can be loud and clear, and I might teach you two things or more of becoming a better human being, if you succeed to fool the once who came before me, make them think they built weak and sensitive, don’t waste your time with me, I broke the generational curse, don’t give me a reason to break your ego now.
Alanoud H.A.
(43)
I can’t stop now! They tried everything to break my strength, manipulated me to think that my mind could fool me. convinced me that their harm was part of my imagination, keep lying to everyone to save themselves and forgot .. to save me! I ended up being the only one who knows the truth but no one believes me.
Alanoud H.A.
(44)
They’re blaming for the trauma that they cause, I’m to sensitive because they provoked my feeling for too long that now I become too aggressive to protect my heart, I’m weak because I’m kind to others. and sometimes they think that too when they start to hurt me but I choose not to do the same, I have anger issues because when I try to talk about anything they put their hand around my mouth like it’s forbidding to make a sound, but now I know that you were wrong and I’m right. because I didn’t damage you like you did to me.
Alanoud H.A.
(45)
Living, we got so caught up in experience sadness and pain. that we forgot to do life, it’s so much easy to drown instead of letting yourself fly away to everywhere you want to be, there’s no such thing as the right way to live, the voices around you help them be silent, the fear inside of you make it disappear with peace, loosen up a little, and if there’s one thing you have to do is enjoying life, you’re breathing, embrace your life, you deserve to live happy.
Alanoud H.A.
(46)
He has no idea dose he? that every time he lowers his head to show hoe disappointed he is with me, I smiled, because I’m sure that I’m doing the right thing for myself, he was disappointed when I was born as a girl, and when my body start to change, I fall in love with learning. and when I decided to live my life without getting married first, I can’t alter the truth, he’ll always be disappointed of me no matter what, so at least I’m doing something that I love and believe in.
Alanoud H.A.
(47)
“I’m risking everything for you why can’t you see’
when they say that I know it wasn’t real. I didn’t want you to change yourself for me, I didn’t ask to recreate you to fit what I want from others, my love is the purest feeling that I’ll give, change yourself because you need to, risk everything for the sake of yourself, choose yourself then I’ll know for sure that you’ll choose me if I was meant for you, if you didn’t then you’ll never stop getting mad of me for doing the things that I didn’t ask for you to do.
Alanoud H.A.
(48)
I’m not sad, I’m angry, she choose to be with him because she’s afraid of what others will say about her being a divorced, she choose to participate in a fake show which preserve the unreal reputation that people invented, instead of saving herself and saving my life, so yeah! I’m angry at her, I don’t think I’ll ever forgive her for not choosing me.
Alanoud H.A.
(49)
I’m so grateful to find you, hiding behind that army of yours, to see how high your walls were I thought I couldn’t make it, when I saw how strong and fragile you’re, I fall for you with thinking, and I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving you, I’m so glad that I found you, myself, my love.
Alanoud H.A.
(50)
When you used to be in a constant war
peace will seems to you unreal.
Alanoud H.A.
(51)
I’m not taking life seriously, I’m just living the only way that I know how, if I let my guards down, I’ll be eaten by the monsters around me, if I slow down, I might not catch whatever that I’m searching for, if I didn’t expect the worse, how could I prepare myself for all the harm I might receive, I’m not taking life seriously, I’m tying.. to get through a battle I didn’t ask to join in, and I blame them for making life so hard on me.
Alanoud H.A.
(52)
I really don’t know if tomorrow has great things for me, but now, I feel like my faith is fading.
Alanoud H.A.
(54)
your dreams are becoming a reality, and if you had the urge to stop chasing them, remember, how your heart was beating when you get one step closer to succed.
Alanoud H.A.
(55)
Remember, blood bound doesn’t mean a thing
if you’re a bad person.
Alanoud H.A.
(56)
I know these days it might not seems so bright right now, and maybe you start doubting yourself. but sweetie, there’s always rain after the sandstorms, and when the rain finally stops, there will be the most beautiful sky you’ll ever see, if you stop now, you’ll miss seeing how breathtaking your sky will be.
Alanoud H.A.
(57)
I always wish to meet you again, but when I finally did, I had nothing but silence for you.
Alanoud H.A.
(58)
I thought I was hard to love, that I’m no use to no one, I acknowledge that I’ll be alone, but it doesn’t bother me, I didn’t know how I be loved, and you can’t crave something you have no idea what it feels to have it, but here you are, loving me unconditionally, making me rebuild my faith, to live alone with you by my side, to not be afraid because now I’m save with me.
Alanoud H.A.
(59)
I shut down on myself, there’s a moment in time that I believe my body could not breath on its own, there are nights I could swear to you, I’m not going to open my eyes again, and the emptiness seems like he loves me so much, it won’t leave me alone.
Alanoud H.A.
(60)
Good intentions must be matched with kind actions, you can’t tell someone you loved them when all that you do is hurting them, do something that makes us believe your intentions are good
Alanoud H.A.
(61)
I deserve to only be happy, I deserve good things to happen to me, I deserve abundance and prosperity, I deserve the life that has been given to me, and I deserve to live it as I want to.
Alanoud H.A.
(62)
I deserve to experience love in it purest form, I deserve to be loved for just being myself, and for the most part I deserve a lover that won’t use my jealousy against me.
Alanoud H.A.
(63)
Healing yourself will show you that you scars are no longer ugly, but they were beautiful from the start.
Alanoud H.A.
(64)
Respecting my boundaries! is not a hard thing to do, understand me! also it’s not difficult, loving me! easy, fighting for me! it’s a piece of cake, you’re the one who complicated easy things, I’m not going to fall for that, I live life with ease and you’re not going to change that.
Alanoud H.A.
(65)
I don’t believe that I’m lost
so, why do I have this feelings that I want you to find me.
(66)
It’s a simple rule, you have to accept your reality to move on to a better one, imagine accepting a realty that’s made of hell.
Alanoud H.A.
(67)
Everything comes to an end, the grief that you hold inside, the pain that you think it’ll never let you go, and the fear, that stopping you from doing what you love, then it’ll be easy getting back to yourself.
Alanoud H.A.
(68)
What will happen if I let you go, would losing you will cause losing me even more, or it’ll help me to find myself again.
Alanoud H.A.
(69)
I’m not apologizing for being a human being, not gonna hide my desire to cry in front of others, I’m not gonna pretend not to extremely happy or deeply sad because of someone, and I’m not sorry for being myself.